A few posts back I shared my love for reworking family fashion but specifically my dad’s incredible collection of vintage track and road race shirts. I have to smile every time I put one on because as we’ve been cleaning out my parents house as my dad prepares to move I’ve found so many pictures of me as a toddler wearing those same shirts. But the love doesn’t stop there. Some of my mom and even Grandma Olson clothes have found a permanent place in my closet. The day we shot my race shirt collection, photographer Justin Meyer captured a few of my favorite outfits. THANK YOU JUSTIN.
Mom’s vintage skirt that can also double as a strapless maxi dress if belted.
If it fits it stays is my motto and right now being pregnant not everything fits currently but it did within the last year so it qualifies.
Shortly after my mom passed away, my sisters and I tried to help Father Keith go through her side of the closet. This proved to be very difficult because we weren’t ready to let go of those memories. An outfit can take you back to a place in time and as we went through dresses, shirts and work out clothes, we did our best to divide up based on who wanted what and what fit who. I walked away with some pieces that I can still see her in. And one skill my mom did really well was sewing. She made her wedding dress, made a lot of our clothes growing up, even Halloween costumes and duvets. Anything that she had made we kept and I’m pretty sure the skirt below is one she made.
I love how bright the colors have held up after years of washing.
It’s fun to feel like I’m still playing dress up in her closet by mixing and matching different items she wore often and incorporating them into my outfit.
Mom’s vintage Levi jeans.
Who doesn’t love highwaisted after having a baby belly.
Wearing my mom’s mom jeans as a mom is probably one of my proudest accomplishments. It’s like our own generations photo.
Handmade highwaist skirt by Grandma Olson (mom’s mom).
So I’m not encouraging you to be a hoarder of all things. Just encouraging you to think before you let go of something, especially if it was an item special to a loved one who is no longer here. These material items are just clothes but to me they will always be a part of my mom and that will always be in style.
Each day I expected to grieve a little less, be a little more used to my mom not being here. Not being a phone call or hug away. But as I continue my grieving journey I’ve realized that it’s just always going to be here because as life continues new moments will inflict their own feelings.
My mom’s health began to significantly decline when my life was beginning to grow. This was hard for my twenty-four year old self to be okay with. How do I find out who I am without leaving her behind? She passed away two weeks after I started my first full-time job in a new state. I’ll never forget her face and our tears as I hugged her good-bye at my aunts wedding reception. She was reclined in her chair, so frail and sad…so unlike her. I remember walking out in tears because I knew that the mom I grew up with was really never going to be that way again. And looking back, I can still see her eyes and thinking this isn’t how it’s supposed to be.
Why didn’t we get the normal life of weekend visits to my apartment and seeing me live a grown up life? Watching me marry the love of my life, talking me through pregnancy concerns, reminding me to think before I speak and to take care of my self. But we don’t get to pick and this was the hand we were dealt. I know she was angry at the end. She was an extremely positive person but she was angry. She didn’t deserve that ending to her story.
And I think that is why I’m so committed to carrying on her memory every day. Because she deserves that. She deserves Grandkids who understand why we love Bald Eagles, and a memory garden filled with her favorite flowers. She more than deserves to feel our love all the way to heaven.
This rambling post is really because each new memory in life brings up those new feelings. We are expecting our third child and I’m met with a whole new set of emotions wishing she was here. Wanting to ask her how she handled three kids, if she had anxiety or depression during and after pregnancy…and how she did it all?
So ask your mom, or dad or whoever is super special to you these questions because you just never know. I’m left with this sweet card my dad found when he was cleaning out their house. We can’t remember why or when she wrote it, but I love that it’s so simple that a quick look can bring both tears and love.
This week is always a hard. Staying positive when you want to celebrate the person who brought you to life takes a toll emotionally. But the one person who’s mission in life was to always celebrate you should be celebrated. The countless marketing emails and social posts calling out Mother’s Day make it hard to escape. The best decision I made when my mom passed away was to not think of her as past-tense. She’s still my mom regardless of whether she is on earth or not. So, even though the day is bittersweet and May is especially hard because it’s her birthday month, I’ve put together a list of ways to celebrate or honor moms who are here in person or in spirit.
Mother’s Day road race
Whether its specific for the day like this local one (I signed up for the 10K), it’s a great way to get celebrate an active mom or honor your mom by doing an activity she loved and can no longer do.
I love flowers and all you haters can say they are a waste of money but they will no doubt bring a smile. Whether you buy a bouquet (I’m obsessing over Boesen’s collection) or hanging basket from a local greenhouse like Canoyer – you can’t go wrong. And these can be taken to a grave site or given to a hospital or place that maybe meant a lot to your mom. We’re going to plant our garden and a peony bush in my mom’s honor.
My wedding bouquet courtesy of Bella Flora Event Design.
Give mom a break and take her out to brunch or visit her favorite restaurant. Order her favorite meal or bake your own using family recipes. Check out my friend and blogger, The Makerista’s take on how to throw a simple Mother’s Day brunch with Keurig.
Makerista Mother’s Day Brunch w/Keurig photo: Justin Salem Meyer
A scent can bring on nostalgia. Perfumes make a great gift but they can also take you back to a place and a memory. These Anthropologie candles are my favorite.
Attend a concert, make a CD or playlist that your mom can jam out to or load it with songs that remind you of her. My mom loved James Taylor, The Eagles and Motown. I have a special playlist of songs just for her. Grab an iTunes gift card and make a playlist together.
Those are just a few ideas. How are you celebrating?